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Dear Gay Best Friend,
I have a question for you. So, I met this guy and at first I was going to him to get a personal training, but we had this weird connection. He then started inviting me to church functions, activities that him and his friends do on the weekends, and other events. He wanted to know about me and also suggested meeting my parents. I guess I am trying to see if he likes me. He has even decided to invite himself to movie night at our house. The problem is all of these functions are in groups and we have never had one-on-one interaction. He singles me out when we are in the group, and I guess I was thinking this is how Christians date. He calls and texts, but nothing is official. I am not going to express to him that I like him because I think that is not what a woman should do. I stopped training with him because I felt it was a conflict of interest and I do not want to sleep with him and then he hits the road. I am not sure if he likes me like that or what? What is it that I need to do? I feel like I have worked on myself. I work at a really good job, I graduate in May, and I am emotionally and physically ready. – Does He Like Me
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Dear Ms. Does He Like Me,
Uhm you can sit up there a play Ms. My-Name-Is-Polly-And-I’m-Innocent-And-Shy all you want, but like you said, you are emotionally and physically ready. And, chile, a closed mouth don’t get fed.
It’s obvious that the man likes you. He is getting to know you. Do you people not understand what courting is? Geesh! It’s when you and a man, or whomever you’re considering seeing, spends time getting to know one another. You do different things, such as the ones he is doing with you – inviting you to different events, activities, church functions, and to hang out with his friends. Girl, the man wants you to meet his friends, and he wants to meet your parents. DING! DING! DING! Are you that clueless? And, do you not understand courting sometimes consists of doing things in a group setting. It’s the perfect opportunity to see how you are around other people, and there is no pressure. When you’re out on a one-on-one date there is underlying pressure to be on your best behavior. There is the interviewing and asking a thousand questions. Your fake ass laughing at their jokes, and acting like you’re interested in a conversation when you clearly are not thinking about them. Courting is taking the time to be around each other and filling one another out.
All you folks think about is when are they going to invite you over so you can get in the bed with them. Talking about, “I’m horny. I’m ready to be in a relationship, and I need a man today!” You better slow your damn role and pump your brakes. Please, oh please, take the time to get to know someone.